I did 21 miles!

I did it! I did it!

Now, five hours after finishing it, I can't believe that I did finish it, and I can't believe I don't feel worse for the wear.

My goal was to finish in under 6 hours. I had set up my Garmin to do a virtual training partner, but I had set it up to go too fast, so it was constantly chirping at me.

It all started off innocently enough. Cool, humid morning, starting before sunrise. By the time we got to McCall Waterfront Park, I was walking with B. and K., who are excellent pacesetters for me. Unfortunately, on the Esplanade, they stopped to visit the porta-potties, and I continued on. And decided to pass some people. And then decided to throw in some hip-swivel. By the time I came off the Sellwood Bridge, I knew that I was tapped, and it was too late to do anything about it. I came back by the starting point, and it was a party -- the fast runners were standing around, a juice company was there handing out juice, and there was a table with snacks. I went on. At that point, it was 3 hours, 10 minutes -- it didn't look like I was going to make my 6 hour goal -- how was I going to do negative splits when I was already feeling so bad?

I ran into J., a racewalker who was finishing up, who suggested a different route. I don't know if that point I looked like death -- but I'm glad she suggested it. By the time I hit Tom McCall the second time, I was basically trudging, having to remind myself to keep good form. By the time I was on the Esplanade, I was having a fight with myself to say affirmations ("I will finish strong"; "I show good form"; I feel good and strong"...) and not just keep complaining about how I felt, how I wanted to quit, etc. My feet had been feeling like hamburger for a long while and I had various places on my feet that were hot spots. My hamstrings felt strung.

I'm ashamed to say that I saw a coworker out walking, and I was relieved when she didn't see, or recognize me. I'm sure at that point I looked like death -- I sure felt that way. I was having a hard time keeping my heart rate below 78%, and even though I was moving very slow, I felt like I was sprinting.

I did feel like quitting -- a lot. But I also couldn't face the thought of not finishing. This was a benchmark, the last long walk before the marathon. I had told a lot of people that I was planning to do this 21 miles. And worse yet, I had missed Diamanda Galas last night, so I could get a good night's sleep (ha!). I had to finish!

I made it to the beginning of the Springwater Corridor, and then headed back via the Hawthorne Bridge and Riverplace, as J. had suggested. By the time I made it to Springwater, I was out of water -- I had gone through my 3/4 full 100 oz. bladder. On the Hawthorne Bridge, I sprinted to try to avoid a crazy man with a golf club who was shouting his fool head off. Once I got off the bridge, I sat down to make a phone call.

My sweetie had driven me in in the morning and was planning to pick me up, when I called him. He had loaned me his cellphone... Now, I can count on one hand the number of times I've used a cellphone, and here I was, delirious, unable to figure out how to turn the damn thing on. I went into the Riverplace Hotel and a young woman there was kind enough to show me how it works.

I got some gatorade, and was unable to open the bottle. I went into a washroom and both stalls were full with mothers and their children. Oh dear God. I just forged on.

In the home stretch on Moody, someone checked up on me, and offered to get me a ride. I refused, though I asked her to come back and check on me again. I ran into one of the leaders, and he offered a ride too, but at that point, I had to finish. And I did.

The woman who had checked up on me was with my sweetie when I came into the parking lot -- and they were both cheering. She ran up and put a "medal" over my head -- a piece of yarn with a cardboard diamond saying PortlandFit 21 miles. I thought I might burst into tears -- that was far cooler than any medal I've received so far.

I was shocked to look at the time. I had made my negative split, somehow, and I was in under 6 hours. Oh my gosh!

The ice bath felt ridiculously good, and after a nap, I ache, but I feel much better than I expected. My arms and hamstrings ache.

5:51 (351)
21 miles
16.71/mile

If I am able to maintain that pace for the marathon:
-->437.9 7:18 minutes